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Tuesday
Sep 02nd

The Terrell Owens Saga continues…

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terrell_owensLawd, here we go again!  Terrell Owens got dropped by the Dallas Cowboys recently, and was then quickly snapped up by the Buffalo Bills.  But this does give me the opportunity to drop some vital information on the football fans (and those perhaps trying to understand for the sake of surprising their man).

See, there is this funny phenomenon in football where it seems that it is always players in a certain position that are causing lots of problems by running their mouth.  Consistently that position is the wide receiver position.  Wide receivers are the one’s that the quarterback throws the ball to (Sorry fellas. I gotta make occasional community service tutorial statements like that for the greater good).  Running backs are the ones that the quarterback hands the ball off to (lol).

Now it makes perfect sense to me that the wide receivers, like Owens, are the ones who you can count on to consistently bump their gums in dissatisfaction.  The fact of the matter is that they are the only ones on the field who are consistently put into the position of having to call for the ball.  The other part of that equation is that the more balls a wide receiver catches, the more money he is likely to make in the future.  The third part of the equation is that if the quarterback doesn’t throw the ball to the wide receiver, then the wide receiver likely just did a whole bunch of running around with no direct reward (though there are plenty of things they can do besides catch the ball).  For an office person, that would be like the boss sending you out for coffee, and then when you got back to the office they say they don’t want it anymore.  You just might cuss him/her out under your breath…of course you’re not making $6.5 million either.

Owens, Chad Johnson, and retired player Keyshawn Johnson, are a few of the names that come to mind as receivers who have stirred things up immensely by their provocative means of calling for the ball to be thrown their way.

The natural side effect of all this is that the other players and coaches wish that those wide receivers would just shut up and wait their turn.  The football analysts have gone so far as to pin the word “Diva” to players like this.

Owens is considered “Diva #1” in today’s NFL landscape.  Owens’ diva ways have now gotten him kicked off of his third team in his 12-year career.  The Dallas Cowboys released Owens, but it only took about 48 hours for another team (the Buffalo Bills) to pick him up and offer a one-year contract for $6.5 million dollars.  In the meantime, since the Cowboys cut Owens before his contract ended, he still gets about $9 million from his previous contract.  In other words, the Cowboys were willing to give him $9 million just to go away!  Now that’s a diva! 

Keyshawn Johnson wrote a book called Just Throw me the Damn Ball.  Terrell Owens should write one called Damn the ball! Throw me off the team so I can collect two checks! 

There is no doubt that Terrell Owens has issues. I gave him a chance until he got on television crying and quivering because somebody talked mess about his Dallas quarterback Tony Romo.  I’ve never seen somebody cry about a mama-joke, much less a cotton-pickin quarterback.  Instead of waving his hand so the quarterback will throw him the ball, Owens just figured he would take it to the tilt and cry on national television for some attention.  Oh the brilliance!  It’s almost…uh…infantile.  At the some time, there ain’t nothin infantile about Owen’s pocketbook. 

Crazy, or crafty?  You make the call.  I say both…with a strong lean towards crazy.
 

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